I am ALPHA !!!!

Salam,
..sebahagian drpd siri Aku Hensem

1. Selama ni aku tak tahu kenapa aku ni agak dominant. Aku suka to be in control. Dan orang2 pulak suka bagik aku kontrol diaorg eg ketua tingkatan, dorm, batch, kapten bola etc. Tak pernah org cuba carik pasal ngan aku walaupun aku ni celaka yg selalu carik pasal. Ramai org cuak ngan aku. Budak junior datang sini awal tahun arituh, ada yg cium tangan aku masa first time jumpa! Dan lain2 bende2 kerek yg lain!

2. Sehinggalah aku terjumpa artikel ini. "Become the Alpha Male" dari dumpyourwifenow.com (aku termasuk sebab nama website dia kelakar siol! Betul dak? Bukannya aku nak dump bini aku .....yet!). This short article bukannya bagik kaedah untuk jadi Alpha male pon. Instead dia bagik checklist perangai2 Alpha male. (wikipedia)

3. Bila aku baca jer, tetiba aku ternganga! Pastu aku terus keluar dari bilik aku dan heret bini aku ke depan computer suruh dia baca pulak. Sambil dia baca, dia cakap "Betul.....betul....memang...tepat......betul.....sebijik....". Pastu dia terdiam bila baca part last2 dalm checklist tu!

4. Tetiba baru aku sedar, selama ini aku adalah...... an Alpha Male!
......HUARGHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHHA
Bangga siol!


....look at your man...then look at me....then look at your man...back at me!
________________________________
THE ALPHA MALE CHECKLIST

1. Short on time
"The Alpha man has places to go, people to see" "He does not have the time to wait on a woman more than 15 minutes when she’s late"
-Bende aku paling benci adalah menunggu! Aku benci tunggu bas. Aku rasa nak bunuh orang kalau ada org bayar kat cash register pakai credit card.....biasanya perempuan! Aku benci bila bini aku (semua bini2 org sama je), cakap dah nak balik dah dari rumah org, tapi setengah jam after that bila aku dah dok dalam kreta, dia masih dok kat dapur org tu dok tapau makanan.
- Dan aku sangat jarang2 serve kat kedai aku sebab aku tak tahan bila ada customer dok terkedek2 pilih apa nak beli! Cepatlah bongok! Aku takde masa nak layan cekadak engkorang! Aku banyak kerje! Aku rasa nak lompat je kaunter tu dan sumbat sambal belacan masuk lubang idung diaorg. So drp aku emo, baik aku tak yah serve gituh!

2. Self-interested, first and foremost.
"This is not to be confused with selfish, or self-centered. It only means that the Alpha Man’s life and his fun come first. If he doesn’t act to ensure his own satisfaction in life, he’ll die a miserable martyr."
- Bagi aku tiada yg lagi penting dalam dunia ini selain daripada solat melainkan MAIN bola. Aku tak tengok bola. Seriously. Sapa main utk Chelsea or Man U pon boleh mampos. I am a player. I enjoy playing football as I enjoy sex!
- So kalau ada org buat jemputan makan, program, usrah, picnic, etc time aku nak main bola, itu semua boleh pegi mampos!

3. Creates his own reality
"An Alpha Man realizes that he cannot be dependent on anyone to make his life fun, so he must do it himself. He creates a “bubble” of happiness, fun, and good spirits around himself, so that when he encounters a new person he’s confident that he will be interesting just by the aura of power he exudes."
-Enough said!

4. Uses his wits first, then his brawn
"A true Alpha knows that today’s man doesn’t have to fight and hunt for his survival the way our ancestors once did. We now ........ does not need to physically overpower his enemies. He knows that using his smarts and his instincts are most important"
- Before carik pasal, aku akan calculate the risk dan be sure yg aku boleh menang. So the other side will mengalah or kalah.
-So far, kalau aku bergaduh, tak pernah lagi escalate kepada bertumbuk. Org tak carik pasal ngan aku yet. Maybe one day it will happen.
-Kekadang, aku ayat jer diaorang. Last2 tak jadi gaduh pon.

5. Does not need other’s approval
"What other people think .... is secondary. He does not need anyone else to give a stamp of approval for the way he chooses to live his life."
- My favourite saying. "I don't give a shit!"
- Aku ni degil!

6. Is gentle and empathic
"And he knows when to rein in his emotions to serve the greater good. He knows that you don’t have to be a hard-a*s all the time, and those men that throw their weight around are usually the least confident. (There’s a saying – The empty barrel makes the most noise.)"
- Aku memang gentle kepada awek2 hot. Hanya kpd bini aku sahaja aku agak rakus.

7. Is definite about what he wants
"The Alpha knows what he wants from life, and he is actively pursuing it. He sets specific goals and plans for their achievement. He knows how to make decisions quickly."
- Aku nak bayar semua hutang2 aku cepat2. Aku nak bukak satu lagi SB. Then rock-on!
- Kalau fail jugak dan semua famili aku gone, aku nak pergi Palestine dan mati syahid.

8. Understands the role of risk in life:
"He is aware that the unhappiest life is the one that ends in regret – of the things not done. “The dreams of youth are the regrets of maturity.” He knows that life is a great adventure – or nothing"
- Kalau kau tak buat, kau takkan tahu the outcome kan? So redah je lah! Bak kata mak aku, "Pergi terus ke depan, jangan toleh2 belakang dah!"

9. Does not bet more than he can afford to lose
- Be brave , but be safe.

10. Forgives himself for his failures
- If only korang tahu berapa banyak failures aku dlm dunia ni, boleh pengsan kot. But life goes on kan?

11. Grows every day
"...the only way to stay at the head of the evolutionary pack is to learn and grow to his limits. .... He reads books and literature every single day."
- Never stop learning bros. Baca something tiap2 ari. Newspaper ke, wikipedia ke, magazines, etc. Always bertanya. Always berfikir. Always critical.

12. Knows that Women are a Secondary Goal, never a Primary Goal:
"Women and sex are an important part of the evolutionary drive, but they are not a focus for the Alpha Man’s life. Women will be the side benefit of a life that is fully lived, and confidently navigated."

- Ini adalh sangat2 penting. Ramai korang budak2 salah konsep. Dok pikir everything is for awek. Pegi gym, beli baju, beli perfume, main gitar, tulis blog, EVERYTHING is for aweks. Fuck them fellas!
-Belief me guys. Kau setel study pastu kerja, awek2 akan datang kemudian. The older you get, the easier kau boleh dapat awek/bini. Tak kira kau hensem ke, gemuk ke, botak ke.
- Awek/Bini hanyalah side-effect je bros. Tok sah kalut2. Peler kita boleh pakai sampai ke kubur. Kita lambat tua. Kita tak de menopause!

13. Has a well-developed sense of humor:
"The Alpha Man knows that nothing in life is that serious, and he knows how to laugh at himself, as well as the rest of the world. He makes others laugh and feel good about themselves."

- Err....tumpang tanya. Korang pernah baca blog aku dak?

14. Is mature and confident enough to put his ego aside
"The Alpha knows that his ego is just a figment of his imagination. When he makes it a priority to protect his “image,” he will inevitably fall prey to the disillusioning affect of pride. "

- Muahahhahahah. Untuk sesapa yg lampi, this whole blog is just my alter-ego. My inflated-self. My virtual-poyo dimension. The universe where akulah yg terhebat! Dan aku ulang2 my mantra of hensem-nest, my bola skills, my sexual prowess, my genius critical mind etc.


- Dan if you repeat bullshits enough times, eventually people will take that as facts Eg: 1Malaysia, Islam Hadhari, Anwar Ibrahim, Autsralian values, American democracy, moderate Islam, etc. All bullshits!

- But you all bought that right? Sebagaimana korang bought the bullshit about kehenseman aku. Bila tengok aku je, korang tertelan air liur dan dok tahan nafas, sebab menahan nafsu serakah drpd terkam aku dan cemolot kat situ gak.

-Aku tahu. Aku sedar. Aku kan Alpha.....

Salam, mekasey, wassalam.


...I don't know, You tell me!


..papapa......papa.........pawerrrr!!